Wednesday, February 17, 2010

poem for the day (as stolen from a friend, who stole it from The Writer's Almanac with Garrison Keillor)

Cleaning up after the Dog

by Jason Tandon

Pull plastic bag from pocket
and wave it like a flag

or diploma. Make sure many people
congratulate your care
for the community.

Check bag for holes.
Double check.

Inspect stool for odd hues.
Greens, blues, blood.

Evaluate consistency.

You don't want to leave smears
on the sidewalk or grass—no prints.

Getaway must be clean.

Prepare to go in for all of it.
Hold breath.
Grab, clamp, reverse bag, twist, knot, cinch.

Smell hands.

Hold loaded bag high in the air,
assure onlookers that Everything is Okay.

If a cop should cruise by,
his crew cut bristling
in the sun,

hold that bag higher,
so he, too, can salute
your contribution.

The bomb diffused,
the world a little safer, a little cleaner,

will not offend the deep treads
of someone's shoes.


In response to this poem I'll just say...thank you, Katie O., for a reminder that I should be grateful to A) not live in the city with a dog; and B) own a dog who prefers to back up into any handy bush or clump of underbrush and use it as his personal toilet rather than go right out in the open.


Check out The Writer's Almanac site for more interesting tidbits...

2 comments:

Lisa Blair said...

Ha, that's a good one!

Casey said...

sometimes sam will poop on top of a bush. it's so weird. he'll raise one leg like he's gonna pee, then straddle and bush with his leg now in the bush, and poop right on top of it.